So Long 2018

Some highlights from this last year have been:

• Finishing an MA
• Getting a job that has seen me spend the last few months of this year in Bangladesh learning Bangla
• Spending 6 weeks traveling around the States visiting family
• Working with Jerusalem PeaceBuilders over the summer doing training in dialogue with Jewish and Arab youth

(For some reason I can't load any photos! Sorry)

Looking forward to 2019 I'm looking forward to:

• Learning how to do my job well at Sari Bari
• Getting better at speaking Bangla
• Finish reading the Old Testament in Hebrew
• And a number of other things that are a bit more nebulous...

I'm really excited about all the new things that I will experience in this coming year and all the new things that I will be learning. I love the twists and turns of life and the unexpected things!!!

Sari and Fuchka

It's finally happened, the moment I've looked forward to since I got a job that would take me to the Indian subcontinent; I wore a sari!

Sorry for not having a more posed picture, but I prefer the "action" shot as I give a speech (in Bangla) at a Victory Day/Christmas party!

I wore the sari again a couple of days later for a party at the church that I've been attending. So far, I feel elegant and stately whilst wearing a sari. I am getting better at putting it on by myself. I'm thinking that after a few more wears I'll have graduated to solo-sari-draping.

Another new experience that I've had recently is trying a local street food called fuchka (FOO-chkah). It is a colorful, flavor-packed, mess of a meal and it is my favorite new food since getting here.

Once I'm settled into Kolkata I am going to see if I can figure out how to make them at home!

I Wonder How

There is no place in the world that is free of poor people or beggars. I've seen them in every city, town, or village in which I've been. What to do about that is a question I am constantly asking myself.

A recent book called 'When Helping Hurts' suggests that irresponsible giving can actually hurt the recipients in the long run. Giving, when done, should be done in a responsible and sustainable way that builds up interdependency in the community and autonomy in the individual.

Jesus, on the other hand, said, 'Give to anyone who asks and do not turn your face away from them.' For me, Jesus' words carry infinite more weight than 'When Helping Hurts'...and there is wisdom in carrying for others in a sustainable way.

I've gone through periods where I followed Jesus' words more literally and was truly blessed by doing so. I learned a lot during those times and do not regret giving freely. I've also gone through times where the needs overwhelm me and I am intimidated by what freely giving will cost me.

I went to buy a sari a few days ago. As I was talking with the salesman, a woman alternated between grabbing and pawing my arm and my friend's arm asking for money.

While we wandered through the maze of stalls looking for the right sari we were followed by different women asking for money.

I felt simultaneously guilty for being able to spend $15 on a sari and indignant that I should have to split my focus between bargaining over the sari and responding to the woman at my elbow.
(I'm not saying that any of my reactions were justified or right, I am just being honest about what I experienced in the moment.)

Outside the stalls amidst a crush of people I saw a man whose limbs were so atrophied that he seemed to be all torso, covered in a skin disease, a large lump coming out of his back. It took 2 seconds for the mass of people to move past him, myself included.

I haven't been able to stop thinking of that man since. I have come to realize that it would have been and still is easier to simply give him money and move on. Much harder, would be to go, sit down with him, talk with him, and hug him. I wonder how often he is hugged. I wonder how often people take the time to sit and chat with him. I wonder how often his humanity, as a beloved creation of God, is affirmed.

I am challenged by the question of how to give and what to give so that the true needs are met, not just the ones that are easy to see on the surface. I haven't been able to escape that question recently.

Grand Aspirations

No, this post is not about desires or longings, but about a different type of aspiration.

If you are unfamiliar with the linguistic meaning of aspiration, please hold your open hand up to your mouth and say the word 'tap'. For most dialects of English you would have felt two little puffs of air as you pronounced the word. Those puffs of air are called aspiration.

Now say the word 'dab'. You probably didn't feel much aspiration with that word.

In English we aspirate the letters p, t, k, and ch. We do not aspirate b, d, g, or j.

Bangla aspirates all of those sounds...and doesn't aspirate them. That means that whether I aspirate them or not, the word's meaning changes. On top of that, whereas English has the one aspirated t sound, Bangla has 4 different t's!!!

Anyway, spending so much time focusing on aspiration has had one odd affect. When I hear English being spoken, the aspiration sometimes feels really harsh and shocking...why must we fire puffs of air out of our mouths all the time! It's so abrasive! I never realized it before.

I wonder if non-native English speakers ever feel like we are trying to blow them over with all of our aspirational words!

From East Pakistan to Bangladesh

In 1947 England partitioned the British Raj into Pakistan and India. Pakistan was made up of West Pakistan (modern day Pakistan) and East Pakistan, now Bangladesh.

This last week as part of learning Bangla I went on a field trip to Dhaka's Liberation War Museum.

The museum briefly touched on the ancient history of this land, people have been living here for thousands of years. Even so, Bangladesh has only existed since 1971, so both of my parents are older than Bangladesh.

I wrote a couple of papers on the tumultuous relationship between India and Pakistan during my MA, so I was aware of the role that India played in helping Bangladesh achieve freedom. I was not, however, aware of one of the, if not the, primary issue that pushed the Bangladeshis to rebel; the Bangla language.

Pakistan tried to increase the role of Urdu in East Pakistan while suppressing the use of Bangla. This particular type of ethnic oppression occurs in a lot of places and it has become, at least for me, a red flag for oppressive regimes that tend towards xenophobia. Oppressing languages has led to rebellions by ethnic groups for whom taking their language is the last straw.

So it was in Bangladesh. I was amazed to find so much of the museum covering the role that Bangla played in the build up to war. This was the first place in which I saw placards denoting people as "language martyrs".

It was an interesting, gory, and challenging museum to walk through. I think this history should serve as a warning to those who would try and suppress and/or take another's language from them. It could really backfire!

Life Goals

I have completed a number of life goals, the biggest of which were living in Israel and living/working in Africa.

Since fulfilling those, my life goals have become a bit less grand. They include; completing a puzzle big enough that I can sit in the middle as I work on it, taking an art class, going to a footy game in Adelaide, Australia, etc.

One other goal is to never own a vehicle again. This means that I need to live in places where I can get by with public transportation.

Well, both Kolkata and Dhaka fit the bill! This past weekend I tried to see how many different forms of transportation I could use. If walking is counted amongst them, then I took 5! And that isn't even all of the options available here!

I took a bus, a pretty standard option most places:

I took an Uber (not available in Musoma or Israel, but otherwise fairly ubiquitous):

Do you see the little vehicle in front of the Uber? That is, in Dhaka, called a CNG. In other places they are called a tuktuk or bajaj. I have not taken one of those yet.

Getting into the more local forms of transportation, I also took a rickshaw:

And finally, best of all, a water taxi!!!

Not only do I not need a vehicle here, I have so many options for getting from one place to another!!!

Diversity is a spice of life!

New Wardrobe

I thought my clothes were very modest and appropriate for most cultures...then I came to India and Bangladesh. So, I've had to buy more clothes in the last month than I did in the previous two years! Granted, I needed to invest in some new clothes.

So, no matter the temperature, trousers down to the ankles, elbow length sleeves (most of the time), and a scarf for good measure. All of those clothes mean that it is very important to stay hydrated. Thankfully, you can just pick up a coconut on the side of the road for a quick hydration break!

On a related note; one of the best parts of getting a pedicure is the leg massage that accompanies it. I was concerned as I headed to get a pedicure that I would miss out due to the trousers. Lo and behold, the pedicurists have sorted this conundrum! They give you alternate trousers upon arrival!

So, here's to new clothes; both in my closet and at the salon!

A Few of My Favorite Things

Today I am sharing some of my favorite things that I pass along the way.

There is faded street art in a lot of places. This type of beautification doesn't just appear on the street though. I've also seen them on several flights of stairs!

I also enjoy these animals as I head to a local coffee shop to study.

In a grocery store, not an open market, but a grocery store with aisles and everything, they offer very fresh chicken, fish, and eggs.

And finally, this sign takes a moment to process. 28/9 is not letting customers know that they are open 28 hours a day, 9 days a week. Remember a couple of weeks ago when I said that 4 looks like 8 and 7 looks like 9? Well...

Mind-Numbing Numbers

Warning: this may be a bit numerically and linguistically nerdy...but interesting!!!

Not all number systems are the same.

In all the languages that I've learned so far, once you learn numbers 1-10, you can pretty much count to your heart's content. In Hebrew, Spanish, and Swahili, 41 is forty-and-one. In Dutch they reverse the order, one-and-forty. English ditches the 'and' for forty-one.

That was pretty elementary, I know, here comes the twist.

There are some exceptions to this system.

English: eleven, twelve
Dutcht: elf, twaalf
Spanish: once, doce, trece, catorce, quince

These numbers don't follow the normal pattern, but we get used to them quickly enough. They are the rare exception.

EVERY NUMBER IN BANGLA IS AN EXCEPTION UNTIL YOU REACH 100!!!

Sure, there are some patterns, but sometimes it's just a single consonant that is indicating the number. I know that if it starts with a 'p', then the number ends with '5' - I'm still working on remembering which is 45 and which is 35, but they both start with 'p'.

The way that the number names are put together varies and I have yet to figure out the pattern. I have to dedicate time to learning each set of 10 numbers!

It would be as if we counted thusly:

twen-on, twent-two, twenty-ter, twe-four...
thirty-o, thi-two, thir-three, th-or...

I'm not kidding.

So, wish me luck! I can confidently count to 20! I'm a little shaky on 24 and 26, struggling through the 30's and 40's. Almost half way to 100!!!

Oh, they also write their own numbers. The 4 looks like an 8, and 7 looks like a 9.  (This is when I wish blogger had a good facepalm emoji)



(By Sowrov at Bangla Wikipedia (Transferred from bn.wikipedia to Commons.) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons)

Wanna Take a Rickshaw?

Here is an 8-minute rickshaw ride in just over a minute!

I feel slightly odd paying someone to bike me around a city. I never felt odd in Tanzania for paying someone to drive me on a motorbike though. In both cases I'm paying someone to take me from one place to another, so why do I feel differently about them?

For me, I think pride is involved. For some it may be the case that they feel that they are better than the rickshaw driver, they deserve to be pulled through the city by someone of lower standing. That isn't the type of pride I'm dealing with. I'm dealing with the pride of thinking of myself as better than those who think they're better than the rickshaw driver.

I don't see manual laborers as somehow lesser than me, so I do not want to be associated with those who may have that opinion. By taking a rickshaw I feel that I could be associated with them, and I think I'm better than them. All things being equal, thinking you're better than a rickshaw driver and thinking you're better than anyone else is really just the same thing. It is pride. I don't know if there is "better" or "worse" pride in this case and I'm sure a debate about that could be extensive!

For me, I will ride rickshaws, giving the driver respect and gratitude, being grateful that he is able to provide for his family, and enjoying the wind in my hair as I breeze through the city.

Learning Bangla

It's been a long time since I started learning a language. I've had a number of years of feeling competent and savvy in either Swahili or Hebrew. Even last summer when I was studying Arabic I quickly picked up vocabulary thanks to both of those languages! I was also much more familiar with the Arabic script.

The Bangla script is a piece of art! I've never had a steady hand for art, so I'm finding it quite challenging! I do really like the letter at the bottom of the page though, it looks like an fancy double heart.

It has only been two days. I know that in a few weeks all of this will be so much more familiar. I have to keep telling myself that right now. It is very humbling to be at the beginning of learning a language. Watching others converse with ease while you struggle to say 'thank you'. Watching others create a piece of art with their hand as they effortlessly write a word while it takes me a bit to remember how to write a single letter. My jaw is a little sore from trying to form new sounds and shapes that don't exist in English, Swahili, or Hebrew. I think that means that I'm learning something new, and that is always a good thing.

My teacher took me around the area a wee bit yesterday, my first day of class, including a sari shop! I didn't buy a sari yesterday, but I fully intend to wear one soon! I've been told that there might be an event in the next couple of weeks that could necessitate it!!!

Wish me luck with language-learning and sari-wearing!!!

Half Kilo of Yogurt

My first five days in India have been full on - the positive way of saying 'overwhelming', I believe.

I can't yet read Bengali and my language abilities are limited to 'My name is ___', 'What is your name?', and, most importantly, 'half kilo of yogurt' (breakfast needs rank very highly for me). I have met dozens of people that I will be working with. For most of them I don't yet have a hook in my brain upon which to hang their names. A few names I'll remember, I hope, because I could hang them on a hook such as 'Ah, that means ___ in Swahili/Hebrew'.

I'm still trying to figure out how to be sensitive when taking pictures around the city, but I have managed to snap a few photos.

This fusion restaurant (that doesn't include any East African cuisine) felt like it was welcoming me to my new environment and saying, 'No Worries!'

I'm in the middle of a very large city, with few trees in sight, but I think I'll learn to see a different type of beauty. Like the green accents along the wall down this alley!

I'll also appreciate the trees that I do find, and that they aren't chopped down just because they are obstructing the sidewalk.

Apparently Kolkata got its first Starbucks recently - I guess in a city of over 4 million and with only one Starbucks, this is what the line can look like!

I have also been impressed with some of the wiring here. There might be as many wires in these next two pictures as in all of Musoma town (where I lived in Tanzania).

I'm coming up with a list of ways that life in Tanzania/East Africa has helped me thus far in acclimating to my new environment. Maybe I'll share that list next week!

Send Me On My Way

On July 15th I left Israel for two weeks to work at a summer camp in the States. By October 15th I will have arrived in Bangladesh where I plan on gaining some competency in Bengali. That is three months.

By the time those three months are up I will have travelled almost 35,000 miles on 23 different airplanes. That doesn't include the miles I travelled on road trips to visit siblings and grandparents. It has been such a blessing to be able to fly all over and see so many friends and family before leaving for India.

My bags are packed, I am ready to go, so send me on my way! Writing this post is one of the very last things I am doing before heading out the door to the airport.  Next time, I'll be writing from India!!!

Here's a short video, which provides a fair visual of what these three months will have looked like for me.

(Hm, I really should have added some music to that video...Indiana Jones or something like that)

Ignoring and Cakes

I have discovered that there are two ways that I like celebrating my birthday.

One way is to ignore it. I did this last year. I like ignoring it, not because I don't like getting older, I actually love getting older, but because there is a slightly mischievous feeling to walking around knowing that it is a special day, and being one of the only ones to know it. I imagine it is what a celebrity feels when they are successfully incognito. 'That cashier has no idea that they just interacted with a birthday-girl!'.

The other way I that I like to celebrate my birthday is to make a ton of desserts and invite anyone/everyone over to have a piece of cake and hang out.

This year, I did both.

My actual birthday was a fairly delightfully normal day. I got paper work done, answered emails, ran some errands, and even helped with a remodel project in the backyard!

It was made quite a bit special though when my dad made sushi for me!

My time in Tulsa has been very brief. So, knowing that I wouldn't get to see as many people as I wanted, I made a ton of desserts and opened my parents' house for people to drop in and say hello.

I love turning all of this:

Into this:

It was such a blessing having so many people drop in to say hello and catch up briefly before I head back overseas. I was especially touched by some friends who dropped in from out of town! I was a bit distracted once guests started showing up, so I don't have pictures of the festivities. These pastry-full pictures will simply have to suffice.

Playing and Working

This week in Tennessee has been full on!

It has been full of playing hard with my two nephews (my sister prefers that her boys not have their picture posted, so you'll just have to imagine their cuteness). I have tossed them around, picked apples with them, tickled them, read to them, even played in the rain with them, and so much more!

I've had debates with my sister (our version of a good time), watched Clueless (because sometimes a good comfort-food-type movie is really what you need), and been able to be a part of her day-to-day life. That included having dinner at a friend's house where there were several deer hanging around!

In the midst of all the fun, I've also had to do some work. I finished dotting all the i's and crossing all the t's for my visa application to India. I really hope that I've done it correctly. I had no idea that it would take so many hours to get everything prepared to send off!

I also have two essays to write as a final cumulative assignment to finish off my MA. I'm done with the first and working on the second. So, here's to finishing well!!!

(An older photo but a similar feeling)

1, 2, 3, 4 States

I left Virginia last week, leaving behind 5 nieces and nephews who tackled me to say goodbye.

Immediately after arriving in Tulsa I left for Texas to visit my grandparents who are in their 90's.

A day after getting back from Texas, I headed out to Tennessee to visit my other sister and her family. Thankfully, my family lives close enough to the airport that despite arriving at the airport an hour before my departure, having forgotten my ID, my dad was able to pick it up and bring it to me so that I didn't miss my flight.

Following a 10 minute run through the Detroit airport, I was the last to board my next plane, 1 minute before they closed the gate. Phewph!

I made it to Tennessee and my reward for nearly missing two flights today is that I'm going out for sushi!

Fun Aunt?

I'm not around my nieces and nephews on a regular basis, so when I do see them I like to try and shore up my position as the favorite, or at least the fun, aunt. There is competition for this role, so I'm glad that there were a lot of fun things to do over this past week to give me a leg up in the competition and leave these kids with the idea that I bring the fun!

A birthday with french toast kicked off the week!

And a trip to the beach where we boogie boarded our hearts out, got buried in the sand, and came home quite exhausted rounded out the trip!

There was also some adult fun, like board games,

And visiting a distillery, which apparently has become a family thing since I was last here!

Now I'm heading to Tulsa for a few days before heading out to Tennessee!

Ends and Beginnings

I graduated last week!!!

I had a great final week with friends all around Tel Aviv! For instance, this last year I have looked out of my window at a hot air balloon in the park near me. A couple of friends and I have talked all year about going up in the balloon and we finally did it just before I left! The three taller buildings behind our heads are the dorms in which we all lived.

I also got to spend some quality time with one of my favorite people in Israel, Alana! We spent time at the beach together and went out for dessert just a handful of hours before I had to head to the airport.

After a cancelled flight I finally made it to Virginia where I got to celebrate a birthday party for my 12-year-old niece and have a float down a river with my sister!

I am really looking forward to all the family time for the next 5 weeks!!!

Next Steps

I've just completed an MA, what am I going to do now?

In a few days I am heading to the States, crossing from coast to coast, starting in Virginia, visiting a few locations in the Midwest, and I'll even stop off in Washington for a few days before I...

Wait for it...

Move to Kolkata, India!

I got a job as a project manager for Sari Bari!!! I am really excited to work with this company that helps women who are trapped in the sex trade. I am so grateful for another opportunity to work for an organization whose vision and purpose I truly believe in. You can read more about Sari Bari at their website: https://saribari.com/

In case you are in the Tulsa area, I'd love to get to see you while I am there! Please message me and we'll get together! I'll be in Tulsa for about 2 weeks in August/September (which will include being in Tulsa for my birthday for the first time since 2009!) I'll also be traveling around in Virginia, Tennessee, Washington, and Indiana before heading out to India around October 1st!!!

(I know, there are a lot of exclamation marks in that post!!! I hope that conveys my excitement!!!)

Summer Camp!!!

The last half of July I worked for Jerusalem PeaceBuilders as one of the lead educators for a leadership camp for Israelis and Palestinians. It's been a long time since I've been in a camp counselor type of role and I am now wondering why I didn't pursue such a career full time, as well as feeling a lot of relief that that my life is generally not that intense. I was amazed at how, in such a short amount of time, I could have such a full range of experiences!

I felt encouraged, discouraged, joyful, sad, frustrated, exhilarated, exhausted, energized...you get the picture. After studying conflict resolution for the past year from the safe distance of academia, I was thrown into the deep end of the pool. It wasn't the pool of the Palestine/Israel conflict though, it was the pool of interpersonal conflict.

The biggest challenge of the camp wasn't getting everyone to listen to each other and hear their perspective about the Israel/Palestine conflict. The biggest challenge was the same challenge that I think most people encounter on a regular basis. How should we interact with and forgive those who have offended us? The greatest offenses that I witnessed during the camp did not arise from some students being Arab and others being Jewish. They arose from the fact that we are humans who have different communication styles, immaturity, lack of awareness, and self-centered tendencies.

Creating peace is both a top-down and bottom-up process. We need good governments who are willing to risk peace, but that isn't good enough on its own. Interpersonal conflicts are some of the most harmful. We need individuals who are able to forgive, look past an offense, and adapt in order to meet others where they are. I do believe that this camp helped some take steps towards becoming just such individuals.

Something else I saw during those two weeks was the incredible way that music can bring people together! Despite the different cultures, countries, and religions at the camp, once music was playing, the divisions started to melt away!

One final picture for you today is my camp "family group". We called ourselves the "Jokers" and pulled a few pranks on the others in the camp, leaving behind notes signed -J. We are biased, but we all agreed that our family group was the best. I thoroughly enjoyed being the "mom" for these students and getting to know each of them!